Jimmy Kimmel Laughs, Shares Staffers’ Texts About CEO Killer Being ‘Hot’

Late-night host Jimmy Kimmel joined the conversation following the arrest of Luigi Mangione, the man accused of murdering UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson, sharing text exchanges from show staffers who made light of the assassination.

Kimmel used his monologue on Tuesday night to share screenshots of text exchanges between people who work on “Jimmy Kimmel Live!” and their family members and friends.

“We definitely know who wins Time‘s ‘Sexiest Alleged Murderer of the Year,’ that would go to Luigi Mangione, the suspect in the shooting of the CEO of UnitedHealthcare,” Kimmel began. He added that Mangione has “become the hottest cold-blooded killer in America” as social media users circulated photos of him online.

“I’m not sure what this says about us, but ever since these photos of him came out from his holding cell, from his mug shot … someone found his abs somewhere online,” the 57-year-old comedian continued. “Ryan Murphy right now is flying to Netflix headquarters in a jetpack.”

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“So many women and so many men are going nuts over how good-looking this killer is,” Kimmel said. “There’s a huge wave of horny washing over us right now. It’s like when one of the guys you work with says, ‘I had a dream about you last night.’ When it’s the FedEx guy with the big muscles and the rolled-up sleeves, you’re like, ‘Ohh.’ But if it’s the bald IT guy wearing Crocs with black socks, you’re on the phone with HR.”

Kimmel went on to introduce staffers’ text exchanges about Mangione, keeping the conversations anonymous “to protect the guilty.”

In one text thread, a staffer wrote, “People are saying a NY jury has the power to find him innocent, bc we all love him,” to which someone replied, “I’m not mad at him.”

“Please tell me you’re as obsessed as I am with this handsome CEO killer,” another text about the accused murderer said. “Yes! So many questions,” the response said. “Like, ‘Can I fix you?’” the original texter wrote back. 

One staffer said she was “texting all my friends in NY that I hope they get called for jury duty,” and posted a reply saying, “God I want to do jury duty so bad.”

Another staffer said she hoped to “bake him cookies” in prison, while another said she was “about to be a jailhouse bride.”

“At least it’s stirring up a passion for civic duty, I guess,” Kimmel joked, discussing how people are making merch and having lookalike contests. “It’s bananas. But I have to say, it does feel kind of good; we’re moving away from nonstop election coverage and back to drooling over a cold-blooded murderer’s eyebrows and abs. I think that might be progress, maybe not, I don’t know.”

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