Why Hollywood Sucks

A recent article in The New York Times puzzles over the bad news at the Hollywood box office. An occasional hit like “Wicked: For the Good” may keep the industry afloat, but for the most part, no one’s going to the theater.

“25 Movies, Many Stars, 0 Hits: Hollywood Falls to New Lows,” says the Times headline. And the subhead: “It has been a brutal three months for dramas and comedies.”

The article goes on to blame the pandemic, the internet, streaming, and so on. My witty friend Stephen Green over at PJMedia made a better suggestion: “Dear Hollywood. Have you tried not sucking?”

Stephen’s right, of course. But The New York Times can’t see the problem, because The New York Times embodies the problem.

An example.

Another friend of mine, the very talented rebel writer-director Cyrus Nowrasteh, recently directed the film “Sarah’s Oil,” which he co-wrote with his also talented wife, Betsy. Based on a true story, the film tells the tale of a black girl in Jim Crow Oklahoma fighting against bigotry to find and keep the oil on her land. The picture is well-made, touching, and inspiring.

Given a smallish release, the film surprised the industry by doing excellent business. It has an 83% fresh rating from critics on Rotten Tomatoes, and a stunning 98% rating from actual human beings.

But here’s an excerpt from one of its few bad reviews in — you guessed it — the New York Times. Natalia Winkelman writes:

Sarah’s Oil is a movie that will surprise nobody. Viewers might even make out a regressive strain reinforcing the feel-good mood: Let alone the incidental worship of fossil fuel… the movie’s emotional core is a Black girl’s belief in her white protector.

Horrors!

Could there be a more small-minded, small-souled reaction to a poignant story of a child’s triumph over prejudice? Miss Winkelman could just as easily have written: “No opinions allowed in the arts but my opinions! No ideas but those approved by the cultural establishment!”

But those ideas are not just anti-art, they’re anti-human. No women who act like feminine women. No men who act like manly men. No stories that explore themes of freedom, individualism, traditional marriage, motherhood, fatherhood or faith.

As a result, you get films like “Nosferatu,” a gorgeous and talented remake that falls apart because it can’t include the God who makes vampire stories make sense; “Frankenstein,” a gorgeous and talented remake that falls apart because it can’t stick to Mary Shelley’s superior plot and its theme of rebellion against God and womanhood; “Running Man,” a gorgeous and talented remake that falls apart because it can’t point to what’s ailing society because imagine what Miss Winkelman would say about that!

No new stories. Just good old stories ruined by bad new ideas. The human spirit yearns to hear tales of freedom and male-female love and faith. The querulous clerisy only wants to wallow in their own dyspeptic imaginations.

You want good movies? Break these losers’ monopoly on the arts.

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This article was originally posted on “The New Jerusalem” on Substack.

Andrew Klavan is the host of “The Andrew Klavan Show” at The Daily Wire. Klavan is the bestselling author of numerous books, including the Cameron Winter Mystery series. The fifth installment, After That, The Dark, is NOW AVAILABLE. Follow him on X: @andrewklavan

The views expressed in this satirical piece are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.

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