Britain: Only immigration can solve our devastating drag queen shortage

I’ve concluded that the British left would be happy if the entire population of the country were replaced with foreigners. Since these people are so virtuous, I would not be surprised if some of them decided to self-deport and hand their home over to a family of 24 Somali refugees.

It’s not a lie to claim that our chronically inept government has developed an addiction to immigration.

Allow me to state the obvious: There is no need to import drag queens. Unlike nurses and midwives, drag is one field of employment where there is no significant labor shortage.

Both main political parties have been completely incapable of enforcing the borders. Between 2018 and 2024, the Conservative Party oversaw the arrival of more than 150,000 undocumented migrants. Meanwhile, more than 50,000 migrants have crossed the English Channel in small boats since Labour took power in July 2024.

Are you experienced?

Aside from jumping on a rubber dinghy or hiding in the back of a truck, one surefire way to enter Britain is with a skilled-worker visa. The Home Office frequently grants these to highly qualified individuals with years of training and experience in a field that this country requires.

So whenever someone argues that immigration is too high, the left always responds: If we had low immigration, we’d run out of doctors and nurses (20% of the NHS is composed of non-U.K. nationals).

It appears that we are not only experiencing a lack of homegrown labor in the medical field. Britain requires radical supply-side reforms in other, more important areas. Apparently, we’re running out of drag queens.

God save the queens

Yes, the Home Office has given five-year Global Talent visas to drag queens from Turkey.

The Global Talent visa program aims to attract some of the world’s top artistic talent to live and work in Britain. Unfortunately, the government’s definition of "skilled" appears to encompass lip-syncing and parading around in high heels.

Recently added to the U.K. talent pool is transgender drag queen Kübra Uzun, known as Q-BRA. His back catalog includes a ditty about searching for casual sex partners as well as a reworking of an aria from Carmen in "Turkish queer slang."

Another one of these visas was issued to Akis Ka, whose artistic objective is to "leave queer marks on art history." I’m sure they will both leave a lasting cultural legacy, something the United Kingdom has unfortunately lacked since J.M.W. Turner’s death.

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Todd Kirkland / Contributor | Getty Images

No drag drain

Allow me to state the obvious: There is no need to import drag queens. Unlike nurses and midwives, drag is one field of employment where there is no significant labor shortage. Besides migrants, one thing we do have a surplus of is native drag queens. I know this because the BBC constantly informs me it is the case.

As of writing, there are currently 24 stories this year on the BBC’s Drag Queen page tag. That’s almost one per week. Recent headlines include "Meet the Deaf Drag Queens Keeping Gay Sign Language Alive," "How a Former Slave Became the World’s First Drag Queen," and "As a Female Drag Queen, I Had to Fight for Work."

I can already hear them now, employing the same low-level racism they frequently attribute to us: “Those damn Turks, coming here and stealing our jobs.”

Exceptionally broken

There is rising concern about the use of Global Talent for artists, as the scheme has witnessed a 178% increase in successful applications over the last five years. Since 2019, Nigeria has emerged as the leading country of origin for application submissions, with a startling 2,225% rise, mostly from self-identifying rappers and poets.

These visas are meant for individuals with "exceptional" talents in music, theater, and dance. Apparently, exceptional is the new norm, as more than 70% of applicants are approved. It allows the recipient — and their dependents — to stay in Britain for at least five years.

With thousands of migrants already working illegally in the U.K. labor market, this is further proof that our immigration system is an absolute joke. We should tell the men risking their lives on the dangerous Calais to Dover journey that it’s a lot easier to put on a pink wig and apply some flamboyant makeup.

There may well be some fields in the U.K. that could benefit from importing foreign talent. But more men in wigs lip-syncing Gloria Gaynor? We will survive with our current supply.