The DSA Gang Is Cosplaying Mao To Destroy America

It sure feels like everything went to hell in a handbasket overnight. Doesn’t it?

The Democratic Socialists of America, hitting the scene harder than heartburn after a late-night Taco Bell Crunchwrap Supreme, have just laid their platform bare. And it is truly fascinating how calmly they can unleash a plan that will legitimately gut this country down to the studs.

I wish I were being dramatic.

Abolish the Senate. Abolish the presidency and the Supreme Court. Abolish immigration enforcement, prisons, and eventually police. Open the border. Grant mass amnesty. Defund the Pentagon.

These are just some of the promises of the DSA, delivered on Fox News Sunday by a woman wearing oversized red librarian glasses and a smile. Megan Romer (She/Her), co-chair of the Democratic [Communists] of America, rhapsodically informed a visibly appalled Shannon Bream, true, true, true, right down the list, that yes, those are the goals, and really, it’s all in service of keeping everybody safe. Naturally, that starts with keeping murderers and rapists out of prison.

I think it’s safe to call them communists now. They’d probably welcome the moniker.

For a while, they ran on a very niche, very vibes-based, very cutesy form of governance called Democratic Socialism, in which capitalism gets “democratized” so regular people, not corporate CEOs, control the economy and public resources.

Nothing to see here, folks. Just some capitalism-loving socialists who enjoy long walks on the beach and having a good time!

Well, that mask dropped faster than Graham Platner’s pants around anyone who isn’t his wife.

Now they’re brandishing the actual plan on national television, no euphemisms left to hide behind, no pretty label, just the thing itself, plainly stated. Their trophy boy, Hasan Piker, trotted out their Marxist machinations at the College Democrats convention this month while dressed, unironically, like Mao Zedong. The murderous dictator.

That was always the play: trip you up with soft verbiage so you never have to reckon with the actual positions. But it doesn’t matter what they call it. Because what they want is not Sweden. They want public ownership of the largest corporations and essential industries. A brand-new constitution built around one unicameral legislature. The explicit replacement of the independent presidency and supreme court with an executive and judiciary that only answer to Congress. They want America to be hollowed out from within, like Troy.

This is, structurally, the Bolshevik blueprint from 1917: dissolve the elected assembly, concentrate power in bodies the party controls, nationalize industry, and call the whole thing “workers’ democracy” while you’re doing it. They even talk about abolishing the carceral forces of the capitalist state the same way early commies dreamed of police, courts, and prisons “withering away” once class conflict disappeared.

Spoiler alert: it didn’t work.

This totalitarian nightmare led to the starvation and murder of millions, but shockingly, the self-pitying Ivy elites who majored in African Art and Gender Studies aren’t hip to the evils of communist history. Or if they are, their relationship to it looks a lot like the one some women have with toxic men. “Worst guy ever, never had a successful relationship in his life, fundamentally flawed and unworkable? I can fix him.”

Their commie commitments don’t stop there. The Marxist mayor of New York City, Zohran Mamdani, has been singing this siren song since he landed on America’s shores: rent control, seizing property from landlords, stealing wealth from private citizens. Communist, communist, communist.

And this week, Mamdani announced the city’s new government-run grocery stores will sell food staples 30% below market price. They also won’t have to pay property taxes or rent. Bye-bye, immigrant-run bodega down the block that pays both!

But surely, nothing else could possibly go wrong here.

It’s not like artificially setting the prices of bread, flour, and meat well below their true production costs (or free-market levels) just to keep voters happy would create excess demand, deplete supply, and eventually produce bread lines and shortages…right?

Quite honestly, I find it revolting that this cadre of basement-dwellers and professional un-success stories would have the gall to roll out such an anti-American platform on the country’s 250th birthday. Our founders didn’t build this nation two and a half centuries ago for people who wait around to loot what someone else built. They built it for the doers and the risk-takers who invent things and then have the audacity to profit from them.

The Declaration of Independence promises the pursuit of happiness, not the guarantee of equal outcomes. The Constitution protects private property, limited government, and separation of powers precisely so no group of envious central planners can seize the fruits of your labor and hand them out to whatever mask-wearing collective claims to deserve them more.

Communists are the unproductive, untalented, uncreative losers among us who don’t create wealth, but confiscate it. They don’t invent; they ration. They don’t protect; they abolish the protectors. They don’t build grocery stores that actually feed people; they demand the government force prices below cost and then act shocked when shelves go empty. And they’ll tell you, straight-faced, that they’re keeping you safe, all while dressed as the tyrant responsible for the deaths of 40 million of his own people.

Unfortunately, we can’t deport all of them.

So instead, we have to point out the lunacy of their positions, brush up on our history, and elect people to office who value a strong national defense, strong borders, law and order, free markets, individual liberty, and keeping America great.

We could also try sending Miss Megan Romer on a year-long trip to Cuba and see if she still wants to bring communism to our capitalist frontier when she gets back.