The Purity Test That Broke Zohran Mamdani

I wonder whether Zohran Mamdani has ever read Shakespeare or sticks mainly to Karl Marx.

If he has ever dabbled in the Bard, he may know the idiom “hoist with his own petard.” In Hamlet, a petard was a crude medieval explosive used to blow open castle gates, and the unlucky engineer was the one launched skyward. That is precisely where this tard finds himself today, lifted by the very cause he weaponized, which now seeks to destroy him.

After the Marxist, maleficent, Muslim mayor of New York City ostentatiously attended an October 7 vigil mourning the Israelis slaughtered that day and the Palestinians killed in the war in Gaza that followed, he was berated, screamed at, and swarmed by his own supporters.

It was a richly delicious irony.

Fully masked Islamist men chased and threatened Hizzoner, essentially branding him a Zionist after loudly protesting the memorial in its entirety.

Honestly, where do these people find the time? If I have a rare evening off, I’m not spending it in New York’s chilly, grimy, nauseatingly loud streets, yelling at strangers through a scarf. But then again, I’m normal.

It didn’t matter to these deranged, daddy-issue-riddled delinquents that Mr. Mamdani looked as though he wanted to attach a suicide vest to himself throughout the ceremony. Nor did it matter that he was the sole invitee to decline a New York screening of the October 7 massacre footage Wednesday evening, opting instead for dinner at the only Palestinian restaurant on the Upper West Side after the vigil. By donating one hour of his life to a semi-Jewish-appearing cause and one sentence to the victims in an otherwise lengthy and pro-Hamas X statement, he earned himself the title of traitor.

There is zero room for error in the pro-Palestine movement. Deviate once from its nefarious expectations, and you’re branded a Zionist. And you’re out.

You can’t sit here anymore, Heather!

All the cool kids agree, starting with the queen bee of the Democratic Socialists of America, Hasan Piker, who complains that Mamdani didn’t offer enough “material concessions to the anti-zionist groups he made promises to while running,” and that the mayor has instead made concessions to Zionists. Ugh! I hate when this couple fights. I hope they can move past this relationship roadblock. Inshallah.

And their youthful useful idiots, who follow these baboons blindly into Babylon, are now parroting the same line.

This keffiyeh kid protester says there’s been a “shift against him in activist spaces.” I love when they say “spaces.” They have a million of them, each one simultaneously safe and aggrieved. P.S. If I ever proclaim I’m a member of a “space,” seek medical attention for me immediately.

The mini socialist, with the charming cleavage tattoo, goes on to say that the shift away from Mamdani is because the spaces have realized he is underperforming on Palestine, the NYPD, surveillance, and the overall protection that he was supposed to deliver to his dutiful cadre. It’s a shame. I, too, thought he would have jihaded the NYPD by now. Total letdown, amirite?

It’s gotta be difficult for this mayor, who has enjoyed the privilege of playing protester in his infinite free time for most of his young adult life, to face the real world, where you can’t simply scream into a microphone all day about the NYPD’s boot being laced by the IDF, or about a genocide that was apparently underway before Hamas ever invaded Israel. Instead, he has to pretend to be mayor for “all” New Yorkers, which means slipping on the “I don’t hate Jews” mask for five minutes. Even that was enough to poke the bear. It doesn’t matter how much he’s fed the bear. The bear will eat him.

He failed the litmus test he helped create, and now he will face the consequences. These people are binary: You’re with them, or you’re against them. And as far as they’re concerned, Mamdani just did the equivalent of donning a yarmulke and chanting from the Torah. He’s officially an establishment Dem. Old news. Washed up on the Democratic death beaches alongside House Minority Leader Hakeem (D-NY) Jeffries and Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer (D-NY). Mamdani? Who even is that? Lost to obscurity, practically a footnote. Is he a Republican now? I forget. Scoot over, Mamdani, the DSA wants a REAL leader, someone like Piker! He flaunts the iconography of communist dictators who killed millions, forgives rapes against those he disagrees with, and would love to see capitalist blood run in the streets. A commie girl’s dream boy.

Mamdanimobster, you built this petard. You planted it at the gate. And now it will end you. Just as the Bolsheviks devoured the liberals, Mensheviks, and Socialist Revolutionaries who cleared their path in 1917, Stalin devoured the Old Bolsheviks who had made him. Just as the Jacobins devoured the Girondins who helped topple the monarchy, the Terror devoured Danton, and finally Robespierre himself. Just as Khomeini’s Islamists devoured the leftists and Mojahedin who had marched beside them against the Shah.

The revolution does not do coalitions. It does purges. You’re no exception.

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