‘Ladies First’ Accidentally Makes The Conservative Case On Gender Roles

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I’m not a tough movie critic, and it’s not that I don’t have taste. But just because I can appreciate “Marty Supreme” doesn’t mean I won’t laugh at the latest formulaic romcom that rolled off the streaming conveyor belt. Just as a hot dog is better at a ballgame than a plate of steak tartare, you wouldn’t want to watch “Schindler’s List” on an airplane.

I say all this so that you really believe me when I say that “Ladies First” is the worst movie ever made.

Netflix’s latest feature film stars Sacha Baron Cohen as Damien Sachs, an unbelievably misogynistic ad executive who finds himself in a gender-bent world where Alex Fox (Rosamund Pike), the long-suffering single mother who quit rather than suffer under Damien’s chauvinism, is his boss. In fact, in this alternate universe, women hold all the power, and men are the second sex!

Get it? It’s funny because of sexism.

Except, here’s the thing: The movie isn’t funny at all. Nor is it an effective or incisive commentary on the state of gender equality. And I’m not saying that because I disagree with the arguments the movie is trying to make. I’m saying that because it’s a poorly written, overacted lump of tropes that feels bloated at only 93 minutes.

In “Ladies First,” every man is either a villainous lothario or a beer-swilling, ball-scratching manchild who sits around lazily while their wives and mothers do all the work. The women, meanwhile, are all smiling through the stress as they cook, clean, work, parent, and try to have it all.

This may read like the upshot of any movie made in the last 30 years starring Vince Vaughn, but it’s so much worse. Consider the explosive scene that precedes Damien’s universe jump, wherein Alex — recently promoted to junior creative director to placate a client who demanded more diversity — sits through a pitch meeting on how to get more women to drink Guinness. Here’s some of the dialogue:

“You know St. Pauli Girl, right?”

“Heil Titler!”

“Right, so we create our own: Guinness Girl. But she’s so much hotter. And they make out!”

“And then she and the St. Pauli girl have a pub fight, and there’s Guinness, and there’s foam —”

“And they’re ripping each other’s clothes off!”

I mean, come on.

It’s not just that the writing is too ham-fisted to be either funny or biting, though it is. The real problem is that this is so unbelievable that it’s guaranteed to kill any interest in the ultimate plot twist. There are undoubtedly sexist ad execs in the world, but not even Don Draper would think to pitch women on a product with a campaign that amounts to “hurr durr boobies lol.” The idea that an ad executive in 2026 would have such a dumb idea strains credulity about as much as a multiverse designed to punish chauvinism.

Things only get worse as we enter the women-run world, where instead of being confronted with boss babes and gender equality, we get a literal swap: here, women are crass and vulgar, and men are sensitive and effeminate. Without context, the limp-wristed affectation of all the men in this film would certainly be seen as a gay joke, and the women belching with their hands down their pants just comes across as odd.

In case you missed the gender swap, they’ll remind you every scene in throwaway gags as subtle as dynamite. The books in Damien’s apartment are “Harriet Potter” and “The Lady of the Rings”; Victoria’s Secret sells testicle bras; there’s even a throwaway bit about a man’s “time of the week,” which is left mostly unexplained.

These moments, which could otherwise be the source of the movie’s biggest punchlines, fall entirely flat because they don’t make any sense. This is especially clear when it comes to the alternate universe women, who behave just as horribly as men in the real world.

This is where the already tenuous movie falls completely apart. Rather than become an advocate for gender equality in the alternate universe, Damien accepts the matriarchy and becomes a himbo: he dresses provocatively, undergoes cosmetic procedures, and sleeps with his boss, who goads him into bed with the promise of a promotion. What sets Damien free from his strange new reality is not accepting women as equals, but undergoing a humiliation ritual in which he is feminized and belittled.

The most bizarre scene in the alternate world comes when Damien repeats the aforementioned board meeting. This time, it’s Alex who makes penis jokes and pitches the world’s worst campaign to get men interested in Guinness while his cries fall on deaf ears. But while Alex cried sexism and quit, Damien started trying to crawl his way back to power. That is an unintentionally hilarious take on the differences between men and women.

This is the film’s ultimate failure: It has no sexual politics, or, to the extent that it does, they are so muddled that they make no sense. Of course, movies don’t always have to make grand points, but a movie like “Ladies First” clearly has one in mind. Failing to stick the landing on something as simple as “gender equality good” is just plain embarrassing.

In fact, if you really start thinking about “Ladies First,” you may find yourself coming up the other end of the horseshoe. The movie’s logic holds that there are certain traits and behaviors inherent to each sex, and that there are only two sexes. One of those sexes is naturally dominant, and its dominance seems tied to the fact that it is less emotional and more prone to action.

We’re obviously supposed to watch “Ladies First” and think “wow, gender roles are really messed up!” But it’s hard not to walk away from the film thinking, “Well, sure, in that world it makes sense that women are in charge!” By creating a society more patriarchal than reality and then immediately inverting it, “Ladies First” makes strict gender roles seem more, not less, reasonable.

But it’s important to note, ultimately, that none of this matters. By even drawing out these contradictions, I have spent more time thinking about “Ladies First” than it deserves. If you want an actually funny take on the film’s central trope, watch this one episode of “The Mindy Project” and use the other 71 minutes to do something productive.

But if you want to spend 93 minutes bored out of your mind, regretting your decisions, and occasionally throwing up your hands in disbelief — just go to the DMV.