They Said Abortion Was The Only Option — Here’s What They Left Out

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Pro-abortion advocates speak often about women’s health and “rights.” At the darkest moment of my life, however, they offered me nothing more than a pill and the lie that my impending abortion would be “just like having a period.” Years later, after grieving my lost child and overcoming the trauma of abortion, I am appalled that activists market abortion drugs as “safe,” and “empowering.” I am also shocked that these drugs are available via mail order, which leaves women to suffer alone or to experience forced abortions at the hands of abusers.

My experience with abortion drugs opened my eyes to the fact that they endanger women’s health, safety, and happiness. Truly empowering women means ensuring that they are fully informed before they decide about something that could negatively change their lives.

In 2018, I discovered I was unexpectedly pregnant. I already had a son and was not yet married to my then-boyfriend, Lane. Lane thought abortion was our only option. Fearing I could lose the first good relationship I’d been in, I decided to pursue abortion to appease him. Lane and I ventured to Planned Parenthood, where we rejected the offer to see our baby on the ultrasound screen.

The nurse seemed to realize my discomfort and suggested that I take a few weeks to think through the decision since I was still so early in my pregnancy. Secretly hoping Lane would change his mind, I agreed to take the time. Yet after two weeks passed, Lane was still sure abortion was our only choice.

Leading up to the abortion, I was terrified. I shook uncontrollably and had an awful feeling about what it entailed. When we arrived at Planned Parenthood, staff told me that I could take the chemical abortion pill, that it would just be like a heavy period, and that everything would be fine. They did not warn me about any long-term physical or emotional effects.

I should have listened to my gut — especially after hearing the grief of the couple in the hospital room next to Lane and me, where another young woman sobbed while her partner told her it was the only choice they had. My heart breaks for her to this day.

When the doctor arrived to check in on Lane and me, I asked him again if he was sure this was what we wanted to do. Rather than seeing that I was feeling pressured into this major decision, the doctor expressed annoyance while telling me to take it or leave it.

I took it.

Afterward, I went to the pharmacy to pick up the next set of pills. I’ll never forget the pharmacist’s face — his unmistakably sad expression and our mutual knowledge that he could not interfere with what I was about to do.

When I got home, I became drowsy and kept waking up to intense and extremely painful cramps. Because I’d had a baby before, I realized with shock that my body was not just having a “normal period,” but that the pills I’d naively swallowed were preparing my body for labor. After intense pain and bleeding, I ran to the bathroom. I felt something pass. There, in the toilet, was my baby.

I was in a state of shock. Nobody had prepared me for any of this. I didn’t know what to do, so I simply cleaned myself up and got back in bed. The next week, shock turned to extreme grief. The next month, I felt guilt. Then followed years of mingled guilt, grief, and suffering. At times, I felt like I had genuinely lost my mind — an emotional reaction I have since learned was due to my abortion. In all that time, Planned Parenthood never once reached out to check on me and Lane.

Lane and I slowly picked up the pieces of our relationship and lives and tried to heal. We both struggled to forgive ourselves. Through God’s grace and forgiveness, however, we were more vulnerable with each other and began rediscovering our faith. Through prayer and communication, Lane and I slowly learned that what we thought would be forever was just a temporary suffering that opened our eyes to the horrors of abortion drugs.

Today, we hope to turn the tragedy of our story into hope for others who might be struggling. To those who may find themselves in our shoes, I encourage you to trust your gut and to make sure you are fully informed before agreeing to a permanent decision that could leave you with painful scars while robbing you of your unborn child. I urge any woman to look at the ultrasound before making a permanent decision. We wish with our whole hearts that we would have.

I hope you also know that you don’t have to grieve or undergo this suffering alone. Across the country, a network of nearly 3,000 pregnancy resource centers strives daily to meet the material, financial, emotional, and even professional or educational needs of women and children in need. These organizations provide hundreds of millions of dollars’ worth of lifesaving support that offers women alternatives to abortions they do not need and often do not want.

Not only that, but they exist to offer hope and healing to women who have experienced abortion, like me. And unlike those pushing abortion drugs without informed consent, these wonderful people will do everything they can to make you feel known, supported, and loved.

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McKenzie Kaupa-Thiesse is a wife, mother, and fighter for the unborn.

The views expressed in this piece are those of the author and do not necessarily represent those of The Daily Wire.