Trump’s Building a Ballroom, Not Taking Away Your Binky

If Tiger Woods offered you free golf lessons, what would you say?

If Martha Stewart volunteered to cook your family Thanksgiving dinner, what would you say?

If Taylor Swift offered you tips on how to wreck an ex-lover in song, what would you say?

“Heck, yes!” I presume. (Though in Taylor’s case, I’d ask if she’d throw in some Chiefs tickets in the bargain.)

However, for some reason, when the guy who rebuilt the New York skyline, rescued the historic Old Post Office Building in D.C., and crafted some of the most beautiful resorts in the world, offers to build them a ballroom at no charge, Democrats and the media spit at the ground and scream at the heavens. Rep. Eric Swalwell, D-Calif., is calling for a wrecking ball before the thing is even built.

It’s inexplicable. I had occasion earlier this year to experience one of President Donald Trump’s ballrooms at Mar-a-Lago. Trust me. If the man wants to gift the American people a ballroom, just say “Thank you!” and move on with your lives. Or in Swalwell’s case, say, “Actually, the ballroom would be a great place to bring a hot Chinese spy on a date.”

But that’s not happening.

The apoplexy over the demolition involved the East Wing as part of the building of the White House ballroom bounces between hysterically funny and harrowing. Hysterical because anybody who’s done any remodeling knows the first stage is, by definition, messy. It’s HGTV 101. So why the fuss?

Hysterical because we know these very same people would be cheering if the space aliens from “Independence Day” obliterated the White House—if they knew Trump was trapped inside.

Harrowing because, without exaggeration, they’re more upset about the taking down of the East Wing than they are the gunning down of Charlie Kirk.

These people are so myopically focused on their hatred of Trump and all things MAGA, they don’t even consider the obvious: Whatever just got torn down will be rebuilt even better for presidents and first ladies to come. Breathe, people. The East Wing will be back. I mean, do you think Trump’s going to leave it half finished—like Barack Obama’s trainwreck of a presidential library? Leave the White House a shambles, like Joe Biden’s presidency? Rejoice that the East Wing will be coming back better and more beautiful. Stop acting as if Trump took away your binky.

Even a press secretary for former first lady Jill Biden, Michael LaRosa, is saying the ballroom is needed, and as sad and nostalgic he is to see his old office gone, the demo of the East Wing was “probably needed.”

What’s in a Name?

The media and Democrats are also in a tizzy over the possibility Trump is going to name the ballroom after himself. Trump says he has no interest in doing that. Though, thanks to the Streisand effect and all the attention being given to Trump over the ballroom, the critics themselves may be assuring that, whatever the given name, it’ll be known as the Trump Ballroom.

Which, as Mark Hemingway pointed out on X, and The Daily Signal’s Jarrett Stepman echoed, perhaps is the real issue. They can’t stand the idea of Trump leaving a physical legacy at the White House. Or a legacy at all.

But let’s leave the Sour Sallys and the Construction Karens aside.

What should the ballroom be called? Some, like Jack Posobiec, want to see the ballroom named after Kirk. Trump, in response to Hillary Clinton’s criticism of the demo, suggested he’ll name it the “Monica Lewinsky ballroom,” demonstrating he’s as good a troll as he is a builder. Meanwhile, I suspect Clinton’s just worried construction workers will find all the bodies.

However, mention of the former first lady does raise an idea for a possible name for the ballroom. Why not honor the first first lady who lived at the White House, Abigail Adams? Or the first lady who famously arranged the rescue of countless paintings and documents as British soldiers stormed the city to burn the place down during the War of 1812, Dolly Madison? Both the Abigail Ballroom and the Madison Ballroom have a nice ring to them. Sounds classy.

Bringing Dance Back to DC

Trump likes to dance. Name another president who inspired a dance craze. In fact, when Trump got off the plane in Malaysia to kick off his Asian trip, the president busted out some moves with a native dance troupe.

Yes, it’s clear. Trump is Kevin Bacon and Democrats are the narrow-minded folk who don’t want dancing returning to the sleepy town of D.C.

You Want to Talk History?

ABC News, which seems particularly obsessed with this ballroom story, says, according to satellite imagery, the demo has also removed two historic magnolia trees and the Jacqueline Kennedy Garden. (If only ABC News had expended this much investigative sweat into the 2020 election fraud, or the Russia hoax, or Hunter Biden’s laptop.) Putting aside the fact that whatever has been temporarily lost will be put back better than ever, we really must consider the history that is set to be made.

We must close our eyes and imagine:

It’s summer 2028. The Olympics are about to start here in the good ol’ USA. In advance of the Opening Ceremony, Trump invites all the world leaders with teams participating to come to the White House for a celebratory gala and to help officially christen the White House Ballroom.

Trump, who those who’ve experienced it know, is a most gracious host. Scanning the room after raising a toast, he can see some of the fruit of his second term.

Look, the Israeli and Saudi leaders are sharing a table. Over there, India and Pakistan are breaking bread together. Cambodia and Thailand. The Armenians and the Azerbaijanis. Who knows? Perhaps by then Russian President Vladimir Putin and Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy are trading something more than hateful stares and drone strikes.

This is an evening for the ages.

And on ABC News, they’re complaining about Trump’s choice of curtains.

Note: The original version of this story did not give credit to Dolly Madison for her heroic efforts at the White House during the British attack on Washington.

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